Category Archives: Words of Wisdown

Saying Good Bye

Saying Good Bye

Charlie Sims

My wife Kari says that Good bye’s are a result of the Fall in the Garden of Eden. She thinks that we were never meant to separate, and that relationships were meant to go on forever. And that’s why the experience of saying good bye feels so foreign to us, no matter how many times we go through it.

The reality of living this life, though, is that good bye’s are part of the game. Job changes, moves, and circumstances happen that force this experience on us. And as foreign and sad as they are; they force us to consider the impact that a friend has made on our life. We think about how that friend’s presence in our life forced us to see life, at least in little ways, through their eyes. We’re different because of them. Even in good bye, we’re taking a part of them with us and hopefully leaving a small part of us with them.

We had to say good bye to one of our coaches yesterday.

imageCoach Zach, the “Zombie Commander” is flying away as I type this article, for an incredible job opportunity overseas.

So in our own little way, we said good bye.

Zach, you made this gym better.

You brought and eye for detail, organization, and excellence that we didn’t know before.

Your love for movement and precision has pervaded our whole culture at Regen.

You’re built to succeed, and we’re grateful for the investment you’ve made here.

I hope that in small and large ways, we’ve rubbed off on you as much as you have on us.

We love you and we’ll miss you.

Good bye’s hurt. They’re unnatural, and I think Kari’s right. They aren’t meant to be. So take advantage of the time you have with your loved ones. Linger a little. Say what needs to be said. Be loyal and true. Don’t say good bye unless you absolutely have to.

Have You Had Your Heart Attack Yet?

Have You Had Your Heart Attack Yet?

Charlie Sims

I was away from my toothbrush one morning during a camp out with a few of my buddies. My mouth tasted like sleep, and I was kicking myself for being in such a hurry trying to leave the day before. But we had breakfast, drank some coffee, and started piddling with the fire so I soon forgot about the fact that I hadn’t brushed my teeth. In fact, I didn’t think about it again until I got home later that evening.

Surprisingly, contrary to what my dentist and mother always told me; forgetting to brush my teeth didn’t result in a cavity. Maybe I dodged a bullet, or maybe it was something else.

Are you familiar with the idea of a lagging indicator?

Some things have immediate consequences and tend to render immediate behavior changes. If I touch a hot stove, my body will reflexively respond even before it registers with my mind. Whoa!!! Bad idea. Don’t do it.

The immediacy of many of these consequences are motivating enough for us to permanently alter our behavior. The association of negative or positive feedback is so linked to the experience that Pavlov’s Dog comes to mind.

This is where things get complicated. Often times, we do something with a negative and catastrophic consequence, but get zero immediate feedback. Or worse, we’ll get an immediate positive response with behavior that will result in an ultimately negative consequence. This is called a Lagging Indicator.

I don’t get the cavity immediately after forgetting to brush my teeth.
I don’t get lung cancer after my first cigarette.
My car didn’t break down immediately after the “Check Engine” light came on.
I don’t get fat after sitting on the couch for a day.
I don’t have a heart attack after my first doughnut.

But if I keep it up, I will.

Maybe you’re a special case, maybe you just dodged the bullet, or maybe it just hasn’t hit yet.

Sometimes the consequences are immediate, other times they don’t show up for months or years after the fact. By then, it may be too late. We’ve seen enough data to conclude a clear association between certain behaviors and their consequences.

What if the immediate feedback is unpleasant, but the ultimate consequence (read: payoff) is a jackpot?

I don’t get a six pack immediately after eating my first veggie and doing a sit-up.
I don’t get strong immediately after doing one squat.
I don’t get fit after one workout

But if I keep it up, I will.